10 December 2009

Taking For Granted

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It was almost time for the morning assembly, and Andrew was still waiting near the second gate. Joseph was beginning to get restless.

"Dude," he started, "Why on earth are we waiting here? You know Vinod Sir is going to screw us up if we're late, right?"

Andrew didn't reply. He merely kept looking towards the buses that were parking outside. His eyes were desperately searching for a face.

"There she is," He finally whispered. Joseph turned to see a group of girls walking towards them. In the center was a short, thin, fair 9th Grader. Rebecca D'Souza. One of the most sought after girls in school. She had long, wavy black hair, twinkling eyes and a short nose. Her face was angular, and her cheeks were normally reddish in color. She walked with a grace that none of her classmates could ever possess.
She was Andrew best friend, the love of his life. They spent the past two years chatting, until they reached a point where neither of them could deny how they felt about each other. Once Andrew got his own mobile, they began talking on the phone. Soon, they were spending hours every day, glued to the phone, talking as though the other person was their personal diary. They were the closest of friends.

And presently, she walked past him without even giving him a glance.

"Dude," Joseph said slowly, amazed by what he'd seen, "What was that?"

Andrew's expression quickly changed. He began walking towards class very quickly.

"Dude, seriously, what was that? She didn't even look at you! What the hell?"

"She's showing attitude. That little --" Andrew said, more to himself than anyone else. "Just because I got angry with her yesterday. What, she thinks things will only be done her way? What, I cant decide stuff anymore? What the hell does she think of herself? Fine, she wants to piss me off, I'll show her how it's really done..."

He broke into a run, leaving Joseph behind. Watching his best buddy dash towards his class room, Joseph couldn't help but smile. He'd seen countless episodes like these. The biggest problem between Joseph and Rebecca, was that both of them had huge egos. Both of them wanted to be right. And the funny thing was, that's what made them so special. They'd argue for hours, get mad at each other. But never would they ever stop talking....

"I'm not going to talk to her," Andrew said.

"Listen man, don't simply act like a moron, alright?" Joseph said. It was break time, and the 30 minutes they'd get was normally when Andrew would meet Rebecca near the library. This time, though, Andrew wouldn't budge from the canteen area.

"I told you, I'm not going to meet her."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to?" He replied. "And, because," he added, a cunning smile forming on his face, "I want to make her go mad. Let her get pissed off a little, it wont hurt."

During the second Break time that day, Jenny came along, saying that Rebecca wanted to meet Andrew. Andrew merely nodded his head, and continued to stand in his spot. Joseph swore loudly, and shook his head.

Five minutes later, Jenny returned, this time looking anxious. "Please," she said urgently, "Rebecca really wants to meet you!"

Andrew walked away without saying a word, towards the storage room area. Joseph's yelling was drowned out by the large generator that was running nearby. Finally, Joseph caught up with Andrew.

"You're mad, you know that?" Joseph said.

"Why?"

"Because, you're refusing to speak to the girl who loves you. Cmon man, you're simply taking things for granted."

"Taking things for granted? What am I taking for granted?"

"Rebecca. You think she'll just hang around forever, waiting for you?"

Before Andrew could answer that, he spotted Rebecca walking towards him. Something was odd. She was crying. And she looked as though she was in pain. Something else was wrong too. Andrew looked towards the large, metallic cage that housed the generator. Something was definitely wrong.

"Rebecca, NO!" He cried out, gesturing her to stop.

It was all too late. There was a deafening explosion. And it was all over.


 * * * * * * * * * *

Andrew's eyes were red, if that was technically possible. Without saying a word, he walked out of History class. No one bothered to stop him. No one even acknowledged him leaving. That's how it was now. After what'd happened on 8th June.

The only person who could comfort Andrew was Joseph.

"Joseph, I cant bear it anymore. I seriously cant," he said, sitting outside in the corridor. There were a few minutes for the bell to ring.

"The pain. It's just too much to bear. I mean, it's all my fault!" he said, tears forming in his eyes again. He looked pale and ghostly. He'd lost weight, and he was wearing the same set of clothes for what looked like ages. You tend to lose all sense of fashion in such a situation.

"It's not your fault, don't say that," Joseph said softly. He looked helpless.

"Of course it is. I should have just met her at the library. But no, I had to walk away. I had to walk towards the generator. Why? Why Joseph? You were right. I was taking things for granted. And I hate it now. I miss her, dammit! I miss the smell of her hair. I miss the way it feels when her shoulder touches mine, as we sit on the bench in Lake Park. I wish I could get back to loving her. To seeing her say she's happy about me. To see her smile in front of mine. It's all gone now, dammit!"

Just then, the bell rang, and students spilled out of their classes.

"Listen, you have to get a grip on yourselves. It's been three months already. Many of us go through such things. But you have to move on. Dont you understand?" Joseph said.

Andrew wiped his eyes, and got up.

He was about to leave, when he saw Rebecca and her group of friends walk past him. He extended a hand to touch her, but Joseph stopped him.


They walked past a large picture frame of them smiling broadly, under which was a caption: "Andrew Thompson and Joseph Stephens died from an accidental explosion. But they'll live on in our hearts forever..."


[This is one of my proudest attempts at writing stories with twists. Please do leave your comments.Also, the title has double meaning. One is a reference to Joseph's statement. Secondly, I'm assuming you took Rebecca's death for granted? :)]

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14 comments:

  1. This one is GREAT Musthafa! There is simply no limit to how good u can get at this!..I totally loved it..I was almost crying mid-way..it was the perfect selection of words to convey what you had to..the end totally blew me apart! :D Simply too good :D Loved it! :)

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  2. hahaha! I would call this total awsomeness!!...I took for granted that this would be another philosophical story...but as usual, u shocked me again ...:D..yes you're right..this is d best post so far...!..loved it:D

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  3. All I can say is you are extremely talented, you'd surely go places :)
    All the Best!

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  4. this is a very welcome change from your usual posts...but i noticed a few grammatical mistakes,so i'd urge you to be extra vigilant on that front,because one of the signs of a good writer is his command over the language,and since i think you have the potential to be a great writer, even minor bloopers are strict no-no on this blog..
    loved the twist...looking forward to more such entertaining posts..

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  5. you really have a tallent for writing :)

    this was a very nice fiction :D
    caught me by surprise, it did :D:D

    but i still have a question....
    'what did Rebecca want to tell him??'

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  6. intriguing....this one was really reallly good...excellent job..original..and it leaves u like "wow..i din expect tht!!"..:)..keep it up..:D..

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  7. Dude I'm just sick of complimenting you man! Screw you :P
    Tooo good !!
    Loved the ending, and the title!
    But a few mistakes here n there; read it again and you'll find them out!
    Cheers!:D

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  8. This was totally mindblowing...
    i mean the way it started...its jus so real u knw...the things tht happens btw a girl nd a guy...lol...nd the ending...i actually thot sumthing else was goin on all along nd then as usual...u hadd to bring the twist in the end...that was the best part....TOTALLY LOVED IT re......Keep them cumin muhtu...cooz v r waiting!!....one of ur best short stories i BELIEVE!!..:D

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  9. U have a great talent for coming up with good plots .... but u tend to be a bit careless while putting it in words.... The story is good, but do review ur work for any errors before posting it.......

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  10. StakeSauuce!!
    A1!!!
    legendarrryy..!!
    classic..awesome..:D
    and im outta words...:D
    keep it cummin..:D

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  11. It was very average for me. I loved your 'Handful of Olives', but this did not work.

    She walked with a grace that none of her classmates could ever possess.

    -- Show ; don't tell.

    She was Andrew best friend, the love of his life. They spent the past two years chatting, until they reached a point where neither of them could deny how they felt about each other. Once Andrew got his own mobile, they began talking on the phone.

    -- Show ; don't tell. Scene it, do not summarize it

    Typos
    ----
    1. She was Andrew('s ?) best friend, the love of his life

    2. Joseph couldn't help but smile. He'd seen countless episodes like these. The biggest problem between Joseph and Rebecca, was that both of them had huge egos. Both of them wanted to be right. And the funny thing was, that's what made them so special.

    You meant Andrew and Rebecca ; not "Joseph and Rebecca" ?

    3. second Break(break) time that day

    4. walked out of (the) History class

    5. Listen, you have to get a grip on yourselves (yourself ?)

    ReplyDelete