What's Wrong With My Hello?

What's wrong with my Hello?

Yup, I'd like to know that, thank you. At first I thought it was just some kind of a joke going around. But now I'm seriously taking up this issue.

For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, here's the details.

Like any active teenager, I receive phone calls from my friends. While attending those phone calls, I - as per 21st century protocol - start by saying, "Hello."

And the smart mouth at the other end, starts his conversation by saying, "Ha! What kind of a Hello is that? Ha-lo? Don't you even know how to say Hello properly?"

I don't suffer from extremely low inferiority complex. But when a few guys, over the course of a few months, tell me the same thing, I start to feel bad about my "Hello".

So like any normal teenager trying to fit into society, I decide to improve on my hello...


"What's wrong with it?" I ask with concern. My friend likes the sudden authority he has. "Well, you sound as though you just came running to get the phone."

The next time the phone rang, I was at my study table. Getting up slowly, I hummed a tune, and slowly walked along the corridor. My mother started screaming at me to get the phone. Still breathing calmly, I neared the phone, took a short breath, and picked the receiver. The line was dead. Apparently I took a little more time than allowed.

My mother was furious at me. "Why on earth cant you pick the phone up quickly?" she asked.

I nodded my head. "You wont understand, mother. You wont understand."

This happened for about four times. Finally, I did dash to get the phone. Gasping for breath, I said, "Hello?"

It was the same smart mouth who hurt my self - esteem. "What's wrong with you?" He asked. "I've been trying to call so long, and no one's picking the phone?"

I mumbled some excuse for that. "Anyways, leave that," he said. "Man, you're 'Hello' is so crap! Ha-lo? Ha ha..."

I tried a different style from then onwards. "Good Morning" was kinda good, until my friends started thinking they'd dialled the wrong number.

"Hi" was nice for some time, but somehow it never caught on. Finally, in an act of desperation, I picked the receiver once and said, "Yo!"

It was my biology teacher. After asking whether she had dialled the correct number, she wanted to speak to my mother. About ten minutes later, my mother came up to me, looking annoyed. "I just talked to your teacher now," she said. "Son, what's wrong with your hello?"

From then onwards, I seldom attend the phone....

Over and Out.

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